5 years | 5 lessons

January 3rd, 2016 was the day my world was turned upside down. January 8th, 2016 was the day my biggest nightmare came true. Something I prayed to God every night for two years to please not let happen.

I knew my Dad was older, and as I grew too I started to have the realization that most of my friend's fathers were much younger than mine. It never bothered me much; in fact I cherished his added wisdom & thank God for the 5 siblings I have because of him, people who resemble him and keep him alive in the best way to me. I would pray for him to walk me down the aisle one day and meet the rest of his grandchildren if that day came. Those wishes seem selfish to me now.

Sacrifice is the ultimate form of love. Giving the person what they wished for if there ever came a time when they couldn't answer for themself. Being completely selfless. It's a tough pill to swallow, but when you really love someone, the choice can be clear.

My Dad rarely complained when it came to his health, which was part of the reason why no one really knew the extent of his physical pains. He fought through any and everything and never wanted to seem weak. I guess some would say that's a stubborn Italian for you, and they'd be right. :) Until his last breath he gave life his all.

Now for those 5 lessons I've learned since that day...

1. Your worst nightmare can happen, even worse than you could imagine, and you can survive & live on.

* you never "move on" or "get over" the death of someone you love. you learn a new normal. the grief comes in waves & changes as time passes, but never just goes away or stops hurting. i never understood when others would say that grief is a physical pain, but i can attest to that fact being true.

2. Music helps the wounds hurt a little less.

click here for my playlist that has some of my favorite songs that help me with grief.

3. Don't overthink or play out "what if they were still here" scenarios.

* the most difficult task was to make peace with and accept that the person is gone. i'll be fully honest, it took me 4 years to say the words "i accept that you are gone".

4. Never take anything or anyone for granted. Life can change in the blink of an eye.

* as cliche as it sounds this statement is 10000% true. seriously.

5. Diamonds & dogs may be a girl's best friend, but I think Dads are too.

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5 years | 60 months | 260 weeks | 1,826 days | 43,829 hours | 157,784,760 seconds

https://www.hahnfuneralhomes.com/obituary/John-Canarecci

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